A Life of Window Shopping

I've come to realize several times lately the notion of life being about possibilities. We're not locked in any way into the pigeon hole we've been told we must belong in. That's just conditioning.

One incident that really drove the point of possibilities home for me was when my ex-partner and I were condo shopping. The realtor for the seller was there, a handsome man, well-dressed, well-spoken, and obviously gay. He kept following me around the condo subtly cruising me doing his best to disguise it as being the attentive real estate agent. When we left a fantasy kept playing in my head. Had I been by myself I could've fucked him right there in that condo. The mad, passionate, animalistic fucking of two people who are unable to deny their lust for one another. Of course the likelihood of that ever happening is reserved only for pornography. What the fantasy did teach me though was about life's possibilities. I realized how I'd sealed myself off from possibilities. Taking chances. Being open to experiences. Being curious and excited to see what different avenues life can take you down.

I realized how I'd allowed the world to be put behind glass. Something to be seen and not touched. Not savored. Not experienced. Somehow I'd allowed my life to become all window shopping and no buying. Longing for the experience but never reaching out for it.

If we're not careful an entire lifetime can slip by us and all we've done is window shop. No thank you. 

Shallow Living

I'm becoming more aware of the dynamic, or concept "shallow living". People who go through life skimming the surface, and not experiencing its substance. This isn't a judgement of those people. It's merely an observation of a type of personality. This is the person the races through a museum, then happily checks it off their list. For them life is a checklist not an experience. Nothing is savored.
Now that I've become aware of this concept and/or dynamic, I'm noticing more and more of these people.
One of my questions lately has been wondering why I don't seem to connect with certain types of people. That's when I realized I've been dealing with people who live by checklist. It's good to have a list of goals. There's nothing wrong about that. To these people though, it's the checklist that matters, not the thing ON the list. I want to visit Japan someday. To experience it, not just so I can say I've crossed it off my list!
I've been learning a good deal lately about myself and living with substance and experience. That has made my awareness more finely-tuned to those who live by checklist.